Jokes
I went to the video shop yesterday and rented the film Apollo 13. On my way home I realised I had not seen the first twelve episodes yet!

Q. What do you call a vicar on a motorbike?
A. Rev.

Q. What did the pencil say to the ruler after they’d finished arguing?
A. This has gone on long enough.

Q. Why did the jelly wobble?
A. Because it saw the ice cream.

Q. Why can horses never go to sleep?
A. Because they always have nightmare.